I am 9 months pregnant. Or 8. Or something. Basically, let's just go with I'm within a month of having a baby. Over the past 8 or 9 months, I have discovered the "wonderful" world of pregnant women or, as I now see them, the bitchiest, most complaining, useless people that I have encountered. And seeing as I'm pregnant, I can actually say crap like that.
Maybe I should digress and explain my annoyances. As this is my first pregnancy, I am trying as hard as possible to learn everything I can about the process and eventual product. This is how I handle everything...I really don't like surprises. So, this has lead me to a wide variety of websites and what I now acknowledge as my guilty...pleasure...: One particular forum for women due in July of 2011. Now, I have never actually posted in this forum, but I visit it several times a day and find myself reading the drama ridden posts of pregnant women who feel like the world needs to hear their plight. Through this, I have learned the following about pregnant women:
-They apparently have no concept of time or are very, very forgetful. Now, last fall, we all ended up getting knocked up and, unless you are somehow completely unaware of basic facts, we knew that it would take 40 weeks to produce the eventual product. We counted down the weeks and, I always assumed that everyone knew the fraction was --/40. Apparently, everyone else forgot this as they are now "unable to stand another day" of being pregnant. But....you're only 35 weeks.....did you suddenly think that just because it got a little uncomfortable that the fraction would change to --/Whatever works for you? I would hate to eat the food these women cook. I wonder if they try to crank the oven up to 500 degrees to shave off that pesky extra 5 minutes.
-You can tell pregnant women ANYTHING and they will believe it. It is astronomical. For this reason, they actually think being pregnant in the summer is SOOOOO much worse than it is for everyone else. Now, I will note that I am sweating a little more than usual and, while that is very, very gross, it isn't exactly what I describe as "miserable". Maybe I have different standards for "miserable". To me, the vision of that is when you have that really awful cold that stuffs you up and makes your throat raw so you look like a puffer fish with cracked lips and clinging to a bottle of throat spray as your only friend. Being a little sweaty? Meh. Newsflash: It's 90 degrees for everyone, you just feel the need (and right?) to bitch more.
-Pregnant women like for the whole world to know they are pregnant and, if you do not acknowledge this, you are taking your life in your own hands. There is a certain sector of the pregnant community that finds the need to remind everyone on a weekly basis that they are growing a human life in them. This is a very cool thing, but people will remember without the constant Facebook posts bitching about it, photos of your belly morphing into the alien life it currently is, and, my personal favorite, shirts indicating that you are not in fact smuggling a watermelon (Which of course, makes me think of the scene in Dirty Dancing... "I carried a watermelon"....Pregnant women can also seem to have short attention spans).
-There's this odd "thunder" thing that women have going on right now. Think: "She's stealing my thunder". I first saw this when I watched Bridezillas and the brides would become irrationally irate if someone they knew, at one point knew, was related to or happened to run into on the street was getting married within 18 months of their wedding. This seems to carry over into the pregnant world. I have read so many posts about women upset because someone else they know DARED to get pregnant at the same time as them. IMPOSSIBLE! Ladies, get over it. Unless you completely isolate yourself, your thunder is apparently fair game.
This has all lead me to a theory that an underground society with the purpose of slowing the population of the earth is behind the pregnancy forums because, if you read this stuff, you will never choose to get pregnant. In fact, ripping your ovaries out will seem the better option. We all know there are a lot of uncomfortable aspects of packing on 30 extra pounds and having a human life squirming in you. Well duh. And trust me, I don't thrive off of this. I am not a glowing pregnant woman. I hide from mirrors, whine to my husband about an aching back, groan at my maternity clothes, pop Tylenol to ease sciatic pain, etc, etc. I will not miss being pregnant. But I also have a secret for you all....
....
....
....it isn't that bad. I've had hangovers much, much worse than this.
Now, I have to add here that if you are a pregnant woman who has been on bedrest, dealt with complications, had fears of preterm labor, or any of those ACTUAL scary things, you have all my sympathy and please, bitch all you want.
But the rest of you?
Shut up already.
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Thursday, May 19, 2011
How To Market To My Generation
As it is Preakness week, I've been trying to keep up with the works of the Kentucky Derby winner and also rans as well as the new shooters coming in and taking a chance at the 2nd leg of the Triple Crown. However, this year, a new breed of horse seems to be overshadowing all of these.
Kegasus. His name seems to strike fear in the hearts of the "traditions of the turf" sector of the horse racing media. He also seems to be striking excitement in the hearts of local 20 somethings planning on attending the Preakness infield party.
Ever since Kegasus has been introduced earlier this spring, I have struggled with what exactly my stance is on the beer gutted steed. My first reaction is an instinctual one as a young person in racing: rebellion.
Horse racing has a nasty habit of shutting down ideas before they even think about what the benefits of them may be. For example, last year's Preakness. The Maryland Jockey Club debuted the phrase "Get Your Preak On". I, personally, thought it was genius. Very catchy, simply a mantra, borderline racy (no pun intended), but far from raunchy. Immediately, it was attacked by the sector of horse racing that expects the pageantry and history of the sport to carry it to prominence once again. This is a really...cute...perspective, but far from realistic. Horse racing is not different from anything else. It all comes down to money and how to best make it.
Marketing is for, sadly, my generation. To be honest, I am sickened by my generation. They are a group of people with a diminishing attention span that finds binge drinking a necessity, drunken destruction a regular activity and boundaries non-existent. I have seen this sector eliminate awesome festivals and events through their lack of respect for....anything.
But there is something that must be noted about this generation: They spend a crapload of money just to drink. Any event organizer must be aware of this fact and acknowledge in the process of any marketing plan. As obnoxious as these people are, they are a great way to make easy money. Hell, the beer doesn't even have to be good, it just has to be alcoholic.
So when the Maryland Jockey Club trots out Kegasus, I don't see this as a knock against horse racing or stooping to a lower level, I simply see it as a damn easy way to make money off of a bunch of idiots. If the infield party is going to happen at Pimlico anyways, why not try to market it and make that much more money? Kegasus visits a local bar a few times leading up to the Preakness and more people end up in the infield. Each of these people spends more money and before you know it, Kegasus has paid for himself.
But I guess racing will continue to believe they are above making easy money. They will continue to cling to pageantry all the way to the grave. Call me crazy, but I find Kegasus a hell of a lot less offensive than snarky owners, trainers fighting every single drug ruling there is, jockeys needing breathalyzers, backside dorms falling apart left and right, and lame $5,000 claimers going for their 3rd win in 90 starts. Horse racing may be about pageantry and charm a few times a year, but let's not fool ourselves. We're not above much, so why pick on an idea that might actually benefit the sport?
Kegasus. His name seems to strike fear in the hearts of the "traditions of the turf" sector of the horse racing media. He also seems to be striking excitement in the hearts of local 20 somethings planning on attending the Preakness infield party.
Ever since Kegasus has been introduced earlier this spring, I have struggled with what exactly my stance is on the beer gutted steed. My first reaction is an instinctual one as a young person in racing: rebellion.
Horse racing has a nasty habit of shutting down ideas before they even think about what the benefits of them may be. For example, last year's Preakness. The Maryland Jockey Club debuted the phrase "Get Your Preak On". I, personally, thought it was genius. Very catchy, simply a mantra, borderline racy (no pun intended), but far from raunchy. Immediately, it was attacked by the sector of horse racing that expects the pageantry and history of the sport to carry it to prominence once again. This is a really...cute...perspective, but far from realistic. Horse racing is not different from anything else. It all comes down to money and how to best make it.
Marketing is for, sadly, my generation. To be honest, I am sickened by my generation. They are a group of people with a diminishing attention span that finds binge drinking a necessity, drunken destruction a regular activity and boundaries non-existent. I have seen this sector eliminate awesome festivals and events through their lack of respect for....anything.
But there is something that must be noted about this generation: They spend a crapload of money just to drink. Any event organizer must be aware of this fact and acknowledge in the process of any marketing plan. As obnoxious as these people are, they are a great way to make easy money. Hell, the beer doesn't even have to be good, it just has to be alcoholic.
So when the Maryland Jockey Club trots out Kegasus, I don't see this as a knock against horse racing or stooping to a lower level, I simply see it as a damn easy way to make money off of a bunch of idiots. If the infield party is going to happen at Pimlico anyways, why not try to market it and make that much more money? Kegasus visits a local bar a few times leading up to the Preakness and more people end up in the infield. Each of these people spends more money and before you know it, Kegasus has paid for himself.
But I guess racing will continue to believe they are above making easy money. They will continue to cling to pageantry all the way to the grave. Call me crazy, but I find Kegasus a hell of a lot less offensive than snarky owners, trainers fighting every single drug ruling there is, jockeys needing breathalyzers, backside dorms falling apart left and right, and lame $5,000 claimers going for their 3rd win in 90 starts. Horse racing may be about pageantry and charm a few times a year, but let's not fool ourselves. We're not above much, so why pick on an idea that might actually benefit the sport?
Thursday, May 5, 2011
I Know You Can't Handicap The Derby.....But Here's My Shot At It
I have tried to make an attempt at separating the contenders into my top horses I like to win, the ones I like to finish top 3, and my throw outs. Enjoy.
To Win (In no particular order):
Archarcharch: He's consistent, has a great classic pedigree (what did I say about that??? Sigh....) and the race should set up nicely for him. The post is a concern, but I refuse to let that affect my picks.
Mucho Macho Man: He's the one I'm willing to excuse for his last race. The lost shoe may have really contributed to his loss.
Dialed In: He hasn't done anything wrong. In other years, I would dismiss him for being slow, but they are all as slow. The race should set up very well for him, but I am afraid of the trip he may have to overcome as a dead closer.
To Win or To Place? (I can't decide whether I like these horses enough to declare them potential winners):
Shackleford: I have said all week that if you like Dialed In at all, you have to like Shackleford. He ran a much tougher race in Florida and was tough as nails. His pedigree and running style will work against him, but I think there is more to him than a lot of the other sprinter speed types.
Soldat: I've been high on this horse all spring and I hate to give up now. Obviously, he suffers from the same problem as Shackleford in that he is speed that will have to hang tough to be part of the scene at the wire, but I think he's a classy, tough colt who can do it.
Top 3 Type Horses:
Nehro: It's hard to ignore his closing runs in his last two, but I have trouble betting a horse who is 1 for 5 lifetime.
Midnight Interlude: What in the world to do with this horse.... I consider him the wild card. He's obviously still developing, but he's a big burly colt. I feel like he will flop and be overwhelmed by everything Derby, but he could be a very talented horse. Impossible for me to ignore.
Santiva: He had an odd spring with a bit of a break coming into the Risen Star, making you think he wasn't quite primed for it. But then he ran in the Blue Grass? Totally a throw out performance. He has a win over Churchill, which is definitely a plus. I struggle to like him to win due to the odd gaps between races and only two starts this year, but I can see him getting some of it.
Animal Kingdom: I got talked onto this horse. Dead serious. I still want to place him in my "synthetic/turf horse" file, but his work was beautiful last weekend. Begrudgingly adding him here....
Throw out horses (In order of preference):
Derby Kitten: I almost want to put this horse in my "could place" list, but I have no clue why. He should be in the same category of Brilliant Speed and Twinspired, but for some unknown reason, I'm willing to give him a bit more credit. Call it a hunch.
Master of Hounds: Could he run well? I suppose. He's shown he has talent and I think his pedigree could maybe indicate some dirt affinity. But there's just too much to indicate otherwise.
Twice The Appeal: Don't throw out Borel right? Well, if this colt wins, there will be about as many crickets as there were after Mine That Bird won. Not willing to give Sunland horses credit off of just one success over the past 100 years.
Uncle Mo: Where do I start? I hated his Wood Memorial. It wasn't so much his run, it was the complete lack of heart he showed. That was a horse that didn't care a lick that he was getting passed. Combine that with all the crap in the past few weeks with GI tract infections, quarters being grabbed, workouts being lackluster, Repole being defensive, Repole seeming defeated, the panel of vets, the climbing action in gallops, the missed meals. Need I go on? Don't even think he will run.
Pants On Fire: .....I still don't know what happened in the LA Derby. It was his first flash of brilliance. Looking back, I still wouldn't bet him in that race, so why would I now?
Stay Thirsty: Too inconsistent and I am concerned his post will actually be the worst one due to all the speed on the outside of him vying for a rail position. Could see him getting pinched.
Decisive Moment: Last won at Delta Downs. I think that's a good indication of class.
Comma To The Top: This horse bugs me. I loved that his connections ruled out the Derby prior to the SA Derby. And then they do what everyone does. He was gassed going 9F. Can't see him being anywhere near the top at the end.
Brilliant Speed: I don't like Keeneland horses coming into the Derby and I just don't think he's a dirt horse.
Twinspired: The Derby gods want him to win, right? Nah. Like Brilliant Speed, he has been put on synthetics or turf his entire career. There's usually a reason for that.
Watch Me Go: I just don't think he has the class for this one.
So there it is, the field, one by one. Judging by my recent lack of scores, you may want to just flip flop this list.
To Win (In no particular order):
Archarcharch: He's consistent, has a great classic pedigree (what did I say about that??? Sigh....) and the race should set up nicely for him. The post is a concern, but I refuse to let that affect my picks.
Mucho Macho Man: He's the one I'm willing to excuse for his last race. The lost shoe may have really contributed to his loss.
Dialed In: He hasn't done anything wrong. In other years, I would dismiss him for being slow, but they are all as slow. The race should set up very well for him, but I am afraid of the trip he may have to overcome as a dead closer.
To Win or To Place? (I can't decide whether I like these horses enough to declare them potential winners):
Shackleford: I have said all week that if you like Dialed In at all, you have to like Shackleford. He ran a much tougher race in Florida and was tough as nails. His pedigree and running style will work against him, but I think there is more to him than a lot of the other sprinter speed types.
Soldat: I've been high on this horse all spring and I hate to give up now. Obviously, he suffers from the same problem as Shackleford in that he is speed that will have to hang tough to be part of the scene at the wire, but I think he's a classy, tough colt who can do it.
Top 3 Type Horses:
Nehro: It's hard to ignore his closing runs in his last two, but I have trouble betting a horse who is 1 for 5 lifetime.
Midnight Interlude: What in the world to do with this horse.... I consider him the wild card. He's obviously still developing, but he's a big burly colt. I feel like he will flop and be overwhelmed by everything Derby, but he could be a very talented horse. Impossible for me to ignore.
Santiva: He had an odd spring with a bit of a break coming into the Risen Star, making you think he wasn't quite primed for it. But then he ran in the Blue Grass? Totally a throw out performance. He has a win over Churchill, which is definitely a plus. I struggle to like him to win due to the odd gaps between races and only two starts this year, but I can see him getting some of it.
Animal Kingdom: I got talked onto this horse. Dead serious. I still want to place him in my "synthetic/turf horse" file, but his work was beautiful last weekend. Begrudgingly adding him here....
Throw out horses (In order of preference):
Derby Kitten: I almost want to put this horse in my "could place" list, but I have no clue why. He should be in the same category of Brilliant Speed and Twinspired, but for some unknown reason, I'm willing to give him a bit more credit. Call it a hunch.
Master of Hounds: Could he run well? I suppose. He's shown he has talent and I think his pedigree could maybe indicate some dirt affinity. But there's just too much to indicate otherwise.
Twice The Appeal: Don't throw out Borel right? Well, if this colt wins, there will be about as many crickets as there were after Mine That Bird won. Not willing to give Sunland horses credit off of just one success over the past 100 years.
Uncle Mo: Where do I start? I hated his Wood Memorial. It wasn't so much his run, it was the complete lack of heart he showed. That was a horse that didn't care a lick that he was getting passed. Combine that with all the crap in the past few weeks with GI tract infections, quarters being grabbed, workouts being lackluster, Repole being defensive, Repole seeming defeated, the panel of vets, the climbing action in gallops, the missed meals. Need I go on? Don't even think he will run.
Pants On Fire: .....I still don't know what happened in the LA Derby. It was his first flash of brilliance. Looking back, I still wouldn't bet him in that race, so why would I now?
Stay Thirsty: Too inconsistent and I am concerned his post will actually be the worst one due to all the speed on the outside of him vying for a rail position. Could see him getting pinched.
Decisive Moment: Last won at Delta Downs. I think that's a good indication of class.
Comma To The Top: This horse bugs me. I loved that his connections ruled out the Derby prior to the SA Derby. And then they do what everyone does. He was gassed going 9F. Can't see him being anywhere near the top at the end.
Brilliant Speed: I don't like Keeneland horses coming into the Derby and I just don't think he's a dirt horse.
Twinspired: The Derby gods want him to win, right? Nah. Like Brilliant Speed, he has been put on synthetics or turf his entire career. There's usually a reason for that.
Watch Me Go: I just don't think he has the class for this one.
So there it is, the field, one by one. Judging by my recent lack of scores, you may want to just flip flop this list.
Why You Can't Handicap The Derby
It's Thursday of Derby week and everyone in horse racing is trying to do the same thing: handicap the Kentucky Derby. But as I poured over past performances, videos of preps and pedigrees, I realized you cannot handicap the Derby. Why? Because it isn't a real race.
Selecting horses for the Derby is a completely different process than handicapping an everyday, run of the mill stakes race. In those races, reasoning makes sense. Trends make sense. Past performances make sense. Throwing a horse out is easy.
The Derby? Whooo boy. This ain't no run of the mill anything.
It starts out by staring at the daunting list of 20 names. They all start to blur together as different thoughts fly through your head. The past three months have been spent watching, preparing and deciphering between these contenders and all of a sudden, they all seem the same.
So, after 10 minutes of allowing your head to rule, you realize you need to eliminate some horses. Starting at the top, you start to strike out the colts who are sons of champion sprinters and milers. Wait. Wasn't Boundary a miler? And Mr Prospector? Dammit. Erase strikeout marks. Forget breeding. How often does the son of AP Indy out of the Seattle Slew mare actually win the Derby anyways?
Who do we eliminate now? Take out the ones who don't seem to have the class. This colt broke his maiden at Po Dunk Downs and finished 4th in the Sunland Der..... Mine. That. Bird. You toy with the question that has hung over every handicapper's head since 2009: Can we forget about this Derby yet? The ghost of a hobbling cowboy trainer and a tiny bay colt haunt you and make it impossible to draw a line through the Sunland superstar.
Speed figures. Speed figures were created for races like this. Give a numerical value to a performance. Bada Bing. Too bad all the speed figures are within two points of each other for the previous start.
How about how the race will set up? There seems to be about 7 speed horses lining up to take the lead. So that should favor that dead closer, right? But what about the trip? Horses never get stopped in the Derby....
So there you sit. No horse eliminated, no horse picked. The blur only seems to spread now.
How exactly do you pick that elusive Derby winner? Let alone an exacta or trifecta wager... God save us all if the superfecta seems lucrative.
That's really the beauty of it. It isn't run of the mill in any way. It's a stakes race, technically, but really, it is in a class of its own. It's 20 three year olds, a fact that should automatically spell disaster. All of them are going 10 furlongs for the first time. All of them have been prepped for this race and this race only. It will not serve as a tightener for a future race. This is it. It brings in sprinters with connections who would have never dreamed of entering them in a 9 furlong race, let alone 10. It brings in turf horses with pedigrees that are littered with Danehill, Sadlers Wells. It brings in colts with only two or three starts under their belts.
The conditions are technically a grade one going 1 1/4 mile on the dirt. These conditions would normally be avoided by half of the field.
But it is the Derby after all.
So how do you handicap?
Go off a hunch. Stay on the bandwagon you've been on all spring. Bet the overlay. Pick the traditionally winning connections. Pick your favorite name. Throw a proverbial dart. The good news about handicapping the Derby?
No one will call you an idiot leading up to the race. The images of Giacomo and Mine That Bird are fresh enough to never mock someone for an "out there" selection. That's the good news.
The bad news?
You probably won't be able to pick the damn Derby winner.
Selecting horses for the Derby is a completely different process than handicapping an everyday, run of the mill stakes race. In those races, reasoning makes sense. Trends make sense. Past performances make sense. Throwing a horse out is easy.
The Derby? Whooo boy. This ain't no run of the mill anything.
It starts out by staring at the daunting list of 20 names. They all start to blur together as different thoughts fly through your head. The past three months have been spent watching, preparing and deciphering between these contenders and all of a sudden, they all seem the same.
So, after 10 minutes of allowing your head to rule, you realize you need to eliminate some horses. Starting at the top, you start to strike out the colts who are sons of champion sprinters and milers. Wait. Wasn't Boundary a miler? And Mr Prospector? Dammit. Erase strikeout marks. Forget breeding. How often does the son of AP Indy out of the Seattle Slew mare actually win the Derby anyways?
Who do we eliminate now? Take out the ones who don't seem to have the class. This colt broke his maiden at Po Dunk Downs and finished 4th in the Sunland Der..... Mine. That. Bird. You toy with the question that has hung over every handicapper's head since 2009: Can we forget about this Derby yet? The ghost of a hobbling cowboy trainer and a tiny bay colt haunt you and make it impossible to draw a line through the Sunland superstar.
Speed figures. Speed figures were created for races like this. Give a numerical value to a performance. Bada Bing. Too bad all the speed figures are within two points of each other for the previous start.
How about how the race will set up? There seems to be about 7 speed horses lining up to take the lead. So that should favor that dead closer, right? But what about the trip? Horses never get stopped in the Derby....
So there you sit. No horse eliminated, no horse picked. The blur only seems to spread now.
How exactly do you pick that elusive Derby winner? Let alone an exacta or trifecta wager... God save us all if the superfecta seems lucrative.
That's really the beauty of it. It isn't run of the mill in any way. It's a stakes race, technically, but really, it is in a class of its own. It's 20 three year olds, a fact that should automatically spell disaster. All of them are going 10 furlongs for the first time. All of them have been prepped for this race and this race only. It will not serve as a tightener for a future race. This is it. It brings in sprinters with connections who would have never dreamed of entering them in a 9 furlong race, let alone 10. It brings in turf horses with pedigrees that are littered with Danehill, Sadlers Wells. It brings in colts with only two or three starts under their belts.
The conditions are technically a grade one going 1 1/4 mile on the dirt. These conditions would normally be avoided by half of the field.
But it is the Derby after all.
So how do you handicap?
Go off a hunch. Stay on the bandwagon you've been on all spring. Bet the overlay. Pick the traditionally winning connections. Pick your favorite name. Throw a proverbial dart. The good news about handicapping the Derby?
No one will call you an idiot leading up to the race. The images of Giacomo and Mine That Bird are fresh enough to never mock someone for an "out there" selection. That's the good news.
The bad news?
You probably won't be able to pick the damn Derby winner.
Friday, March 25, 2011
Baby's First Sounds
At 23 weeks, I'm at that point in the pregnancy where the discomforts are gone, but the actual birth is too far away to actually get excited for. Combined with the fact that this era of my pregnancy is existing during the most boring month of the year (March sucks), I have been left to my own thoughts, which is quite dangerous right now. So today, I thought about my birth plan. My birth plan basically consists of "What does the doctor think is best?" and "Wipe that baby off before we have the whole bonding time". Feeling incredibly shallow, I figured, what the hell, let's delve into the music of the birth. I'm a freakishly musical person. When I say that, I don't want you to get an image of someone who can actually play an instrument, sing, read music, or name chords. No, I just am highly opinionated about music. So I started Googling other mothers to be's playlists for labor and delivery.
My goodness. How boring are people? I'm reading about playlists fraught with positive, uplifting....ug music. Like...Lee Ann Womack's "I Hope You Dance" (Not a shot against Ms. Womack, who I believe is one of the geniuses of country music. I just consider this song a low point in her career). And...John Mayer's "Daughters" (I think my husband would leave the delivery room if John Mayer came on any musical device. I might too.). Yanni (We want the kid to never come out?). Carrie Underwood (I WILL walk out of the delivery).
It seems as though the masses have a completely different view of uplifting music than I do. So I'm wiping the board clean and coming up with a labor playlist, me style:
-Beach Boys: I've heard picturing your "happy place" is key to sanity in labor. So my happy place is Coronado Beach in July which is synonymous with "Good Vibrations" and "All Summer Long"
-Brooks and Dunn "Feels Good, Don't It"-Just to mock myself
-Bryan Adams-Confession: I love Bryan Adams' mid to late 90's music. I listened to it on repeat on a trip to Kentucky when I was 15 or so. Therefore, "18 Til I Die" is weirdly soothing to me because I always smell damp Bluegrass. Not sure if I will have the focus to daydream however. This is a wildcard
-Cross Canadian Ragweed-Um....I have a problem. I adore CCR and I have this obsession with my child instantly being bad ass and awesome, so I'm thinking the best way to jump on that fasttrack is to be born to the Back To Tulsa version of "Hammer Down". The live effect will be important. Cheers will help, I assume. Oh, and also the entire "Live At Billy Bob's" cd. The guitar riff in "Mexican Sky" is sure to make the contractions seem shorter and happier.
-Old school Dixie Chicks-Ya know, before they got political and they were just fun. "Wide Open Spaces" is sure to inspire the kid to exit quickly.
-The Eagles: Specifically "Take It Easy" and "Peaceful Easy Feeling". Now that's soothing music in my book.
-Gary Allan "Get Off On The Pain"- Hee hee, I'm soooo funny. But seriously, awesome song. Probably will be thrown on there just for my own entertainment.
-Jason Boland-"Up and Gone" specifically.
-Johnny Cash "Hurt"- Another hee hee moment.
-Merle Haggard-All of it. I have no reason other than every event should have Merle Haggard involved. I fully expect him to be part of the baptism playlist as well.
-Nitty Gritty Dirt Band- Oh ya know, "Fishin' In The Dark", "Battle of New Orleans", "Shot Full of Love". Again, no reason beyond my own addiction to the greatest band evah.
-Randy Rogers Band "Somebody Take Me Home"-Inspiration.
-Reckless Kelly-Everything. If that fiddling and guitar work doesn't get the kid excited to exit into the world, it's not my kid.
-Shooter Jennings "4th of July" - Ok baby is due a little later than that, but still in July. Good enough excuse for me to listen to Shooter.
-Zac Brown Band's version of "The Devil Went Down To Georgia"- One of the few songs that can inspire me to run. If it can do that, it can probably inspire other impossible feats as well.
So that's what I'm thinking. Apparently, the general mother population on the internet will assume I am ruining my child's life immediately at birth by not soothing it with Michael Buble and otherwise "soothing" music, but I'm good with it. This kid is going to be far from ordinary anyways, right?
My goodness. How boring are people? I'm reading about playlists fraught with positive, uplifting....ug music. Like...Lee Ann Womack's "I Hope You Dance" (Not a shot against Ms. Womack, who I believe is one of the geniuses of country music. I just consider this song a low point in her career). And...John Mayer's "Daughters" (I think my husband would leave the delivery room if John Mayer came on any musical device. I might too.). Yanni (We want the kid to never come out?). Carrie Underwood (I WILL walk out of the delivery).
It seems as though the masses have a completely different view of uplifting music than I do. So I'm wiping the board clean and coming up with a labor playlist, me style:
-Beach Boys: I've heard picturing your "happy place" is key to sanity in labor. So my happy place is Coronado Beach in July which is synonymous with "Good Vibrations" and "All Summer Long"
-Brooks and Dunn "Feels Good, Don't It"-Just to mock myself
-Bryan Adams-Confession: I love Bryan Adams' mid to late 90's music. I listened to it on repeat on a trip to Kentucky when I was 15 or so. Therefore, "18 Til I Die" is weirdly soothing to me because I always smell damp Bluegrass. Not sure if I will have the focus to daydream however. This is a wildcard
-Cross Canadian Ragweed-Um....I have a problem. I adore CCR and I have this obsession with my child instantly being bad ass and awesome, so I'm thinking the best way to jump on that fasttrack is to be born to the Back To Tulsa version of "Hammer Down". The live effect will be important. Cheers will help, I assume. Oh, and also the entire "Live At Billy Bob's" cd. The guitar riff in "Mexican Sky" is sure to make the contractions seem shorter and happier.
-Old school Dixie Chicks-Ya know, before they got political and they were just fun. "Wide Open Spaces" is sure to inspire the kid to exit quickly.
-The Eagles: Specifically "Take It Easy" and "Peaceful Easy Feeling". Now that's soothing music in my book.
-Gary Allan "Get Off On The Pain"- Hee hee, I'm soooo funny. But seriously, awesome song. Probably will be thrown on there just for my own entertainment.
-Jason Boland-"Up and Gone" specifically.
-Johnny Cash "Hurt"- Another hee hee moment.
-Merle Haggard-All of it. I have no reason other than every event should have Merle Haggard involved. I fully expect him to be part of the baptism playlist as well.
-Nitty Gritty Dirt Band- Oh ya know, "Fishin' In The Dark", "Battle of New Orleans", "Shot Full of Love". Again, no reason beyond my own addiction to the greatest band evah.
-Randy Rogers Band "Somebody Take Me Home"-Inspiration.
-Reckless Kelly-Everything. If that fiddling and guitar work doesn't get the kid excited to exit into the world, it's not my kid.
-Shooter Jennings "4th of July" - Ok baby is due a little later than that, but still in July. Good enough excuse for me to listen to Shooter.
-Zac Brown Band's version of "The Devil Went Down To Georgia"- One of the few songs that can inspire me to run. If it can do that, it can probably inspire other impossible feats as well.
So that's what I'm thinking. Apparently, the general mother population on the internet will assume I am ruining my child's life immediately at birth by not soothing it with Michael Buble and otherwise "soothing" music, but I'm good with it. This kid is going to be far from ordinary anyways, right?
Monday, March 14, 2011
Jumping on the Derby Top 10 Bandwagon
It seems if you are a "member" of the online horse racing community and it happens to be March or April, this odd need to turn organize, analyze and rank rears its ugly head. Maybe it's the intense desire to prove that, at one point in the spring, you had the Derby winner on your radar even if you end up betting the ranch on the 2-1 shot that gets lost down the Churchill stretch in the big dance. Either way, I have been struck with this need to rank and analyze what I feel are my top 10 Derby horses.
1.) Uncle Mo- Duh, right? Well, let me tell you, I actually have him shakily up here for a few reasons. Mostly, I can't stop arguing with myself about how I really feel about him. On the pro side, he has kicked the ass of anyone he meets. He's an absolute stunner to look at (if only picking winners was that easy right?). He's professional and has shown no mental gaps. He has tactical speed. The cons though? Here's where it gets sticky. His connections. I know, I know. Pletcher has won every race short of the Tour de France and took the Derby last year, but I still have hesitations. Uncle Mo is definitely the best colt he has ever brought up to this race, but can we actually be confident enough in Pletcher to trust the public workout this weekend and the Wood Memorial to be enough to prep a colt for the biggest test of his young career? Likewise, what proof do we have that Pletcher can prime a horse for the entire Triple Crown, because I guarantee you, if he wins the Derby, that won't be enough. Also on the con side, we have that pesky pedigree issue. Now, I'm willing to dismiss this seeing as I have witnessed many miler pedigrees able to get the mile and a quarter and beyond. Plus, he has yet to show any slowing due to distance. So the short story on all this rambling? He's #1 for now, but I don't think I can bet him come Derby day, so my eyes are peeled for "the one" who will knock him off the top of my list.
2.) Soldat: From now on, he will be referred to, by me, as "Sol DAT bitches!" I adore this colt and I adore his connections for being so brave in diversifying his schedule. He can do basically anything on any surface. He showed an awful lot of talent in the Fountain of Youth and he can easily come up to the Derby as a solid second choice. My concerns lie in his ability to relax and, once again, his pedigree is slightly shaky, but he's a beautiful colt with a great stride who I look forward to watching race again.
3.) Premier Pegasus: I feel obliged to put him here, because he did win the race in impressive fashion. Unfortunately, it's easy to find a hole in that argument when you see the fractions he was closing against. The race basically fell in his lap, but it could have just as easily fallen into the lap of Jaycito or a variety of other closers. He's got a great pedigree for the Derby, but his connections leave a lot of question marks. My biases that have existed since I fell in love with his daddy in 2000 might also have something to do with my willingness to throw him up so high.
4.) Mucho Macho Man: This colt will most likely end up kicking ass in Louisiana and still come into the Derby with question marks as The Fair Grounds has been a less than desirable place to put together a campaign. He is consistent, however, and though he may not be the flashiest runner, he must be respected.
5.) Jaycito: I'm willing to give him a lot of leeway for the San Felipe. No one was beating Premier Pegasus and the best he could do is run his race and look forward to the next race. He stands to improve a lot off of that race and I fully expect him to. He stands as one of Baffert's best bets and, come Triple Crown season, I have to give Baffert a lot of respect.
6.) Dialed In: His last performance didn't disappoint me that much. It's more the running style that disappoints me. Dead closers rarely perform consistently, so getting really excited about them seems like setting myself up for disappointment. I'll put him here because he didn't completely flop in the allowance, but I'm chilly on him.
7.) Stay Thirsty: Ahhh the other horse. Real Quiet. Charismatic. Ya know. The other horses. I don't think this one will end up in that list, but Lord knows he has the pedigree to do anything. He's another lightly raced Pletcher trainee, so I guess those are basically a dime a dozen these days, but he could make some noise wherever his stablemate isn't.
8.) Archarcharch: Doesn't he just have that sexy worker horse pedigree? By Arch out of a Woodman mare. Rawr. Solid. I like him. Obviously there are a lot of question marks, but those should be answered this weekend in the Rebel.
9.) Rogue Romance: His injury is a bit disappointing in that the slightest things can sidetrack a campaign, but I feel his performance in the Risen Star was a lot better than it was given credit for. I do fear that they have been throwing darts with him and are hoping the Derby trail sticks. If he doesn't make the Derby, he's one of my picks for a sleeper in the Colonial Turf Series.
10.) To Honor And Serve: Here's a fun one for you. If he can come back with a win in the Florida Derby, expect to see him at the top or near the top of my list. My hope is that he is simply being primed for the right time, so being concerned is premature, but I am too shaky to place him super high.
1.) Uncle Mo- Duh, right? Well, let me tell you, I actually have him shakily up here for a few reasons. Mostly, I can't stop arguing with myself about how I really feel about him. On the pro side, he has kicked the ass of anyone he meets. He's an absolute stunner to look at (if only picking winners was that easy right?). He's professional and has shown no mental gaps. He has tactical speed. The cons though? Here's where it gets sticky. His connections. I know, I know. Pletcher has won every race short of the Tour de France and took the Derby last year, but I still have hesitations. Uncle Mo is definitely the best colt he has ever brought up to this race, but can we actually be confident enough in Pletcher to trust the public workout this weekend and the Wood Memorial to be enough to prep a colt for the biggest test of his young career? Likewise, what proof do we have that Pletcher can prime a horse for the entire Triple Crown, because I guarantee you, if he wins the Derby, that won't be enough. Also on the con side, we have that pesky pedigree issue. Now, I'm willing to dismiss this seeing as I have witnessed many miler pedigrees able to get the mile and a quarter and beyond. Plus, he has yet to show any slowing due to distance. So the short story on all this rambling? He's #1 for now, but I don't think I can bet him come Derby day, so my eyes are peeled for "the one" who will knock him off the top of my list.
2.) Soldat: From now on, he will be referred to, by me, as "Sol DAT bitches!" I adore this colt and I adore his connections for being so brave in diversifying his schedule. He can do basically anything on any surface. He showed an awful lot of talent in the Fountain of Youth and he can easily come up to the Derby as a solid second choice. My concerns lie in his ability to relax and, once again, his pedigree is slightly shaky, but he's a beautiful colt with a great stride who I look forward to watching race again.
3.) Premier Pegasus: I feel obliged to put him here, because he did win the race in impressive fashion. Unfortunately, it's easy to find a hole in that argument when you see the fractions he was closing against. The race basically fell in his lap, but it could have just as easily fallen into the lap of Jaycito or a variety of other closers. He's got a great pedigree for the Derby, but his connections leave a lot of question marks. My biases that have existed since I fell in love with his daddy in 2000 might also have something to do with my willingness to throw him up so high.
4.) Mucho Macho Man: This colt will most likely end up kicking ass in Louisiana and still come into the Derby with question marks as The Fair Grounds has been a less than desirable place to put together a campaign. He is consistent, however, and though he may not be the flashiest runner, he must be respected.
5.) Jaycito: I'm willing to give him a lot of leeway for the San Felipe. No one was beating Premier Pegasus and the best he could do is run his race and look forward to the next race. He stands to improve a lot off of that race and I fully expect him to. He stands as one of Baffert's best bets and, come Triple Crown season, I have to give Baffert a lot of respect.
6.) Dialed In: His last performance didn't disappoint me that much. It's more the running style that disappoints me. Dead closers rarely perform consistently, so getting really excited about them seems like setting myself up for disappointment. I'll put him here because he didn't completely flop in the allowance, but I'm chilly on him.
7.) Stay Thirsty: Ahhh the other horse. Real Quiet. Charismatic. Ya know. The other horses. I don't think this one will end up in that list, but Lord knows he has the pedigree to do anything. He's another lightly raced Pletcher trainee, so I guess those are basically a dime a dozen these days, but he could make some noise wherever his stablemate isn't.
8.) Archarcharch: Doesn't he just have that sexy worker horse pedigree? By Arch out of a Woodman mare. Rawr. Solid. I like him. Obviously there are a lot of question marks, but those should be answered this weekend in the Rebel.
9.) Rogue Romance: His injury is a bit disappointing in that the slightest things can sidetrack a campaign, but I feel his performance in the Risen Star was a lot better than it was given credit for. I do fear that they have been throwing darts with him and are hoping the Derby trail sticks. If he doesn't make the Derby, he's one of my picks for a sleeper in the Colonial Turf Series.
10.) To Honor And Serve: Here's a fun one for you. If he can come back with a win in the Florida Derby, expect to see him at the top or near the top of my list. My hope is that he is simply being primed for the right time, so being concerned is premature, but I am too shaky to place him super high.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
PR in Horse Racing
PR and Marketing is no new thing to the world of horse racing. Tracks have been hiring whole crews for just this purpose. Farms have stretched the imaginations in advertising. ADW's find the oddest gimmicks to get people to wager with them. But now, something new is arising. How important is PR and marketing of the individual racehorse?
We have seen it in full flight with Zenyatta this previous year as her owners, rather than take her on a tour of the United States, let the United States come to her. Dozens of photos popped up on Facebook and Twitter of people visiting with the big mare. And we're not just talking the celebrities propped in there for a photo op. No, people like you and me were able to wander on the backside to get a glimpse, a picture and maybe share a treat with the great mare.
The result? Well, obviously, a fan favorite, but also a development in the media of a horse's personality. Now, anyone who has spent 5 minutes around horses knows that every horse has a personality; the quirks, attitudes, moods and habits that individualize a horse from the herd. We have heard about a few of these attributes in the past in pre-Derby writeups, or in overdramatized NBC and ESPN features during racing broadcasts, but for the first time in a long time, people knew WHO this mare was and embraced it.
Now, we are seeing this continue with expected 2 year old champion Uncle Mo. He has a Twitter account, a Facebook account, and a feisty sense of humor....or so it seems. Sure, it may seem gimmicky, and it is, but something big is happening as well. Fans, press and handicappers suddenly have ownership in this colt as his daily activities, candid snapshots and future plans are shared with them personally.
So what does this do for the sport? At first glance, I found myself thinking "Cute, but it doesn't really have a value". And then I thought a bit more. Blake Shelton, previously an under the radar country singer, busted out in a big way this year. I used to hate him. Then, I started following him on Twitter. And he revealed his personality, his quirks, habits, moods and preferences. I started to find myself wanting to hear his new music. This fall, he won Male Vocalist of the Year. Now, I'm not saying Twitter did that. Of course not. That would be like saying Twitter will win the Eclipse Award for Uncle Mo. But when a star allows themselves to be "exposed" to fans and the such, the industry benefits. Maybe we will see people visiting the track to see Uncle Mo. Maybe we will lose the black eye as the day to day operation is revealed without fear. Maybe, just maybe, some of these people will find out what the rest of us have and be hooked for life. Not bad for a free sign up and a few seconds of work every day on the part of the racehorse's connections.
We have seen it in full flight with Zenyatta this previous year as her owners, rather than take her on a tour of the United States, let the United States come to her. Dozens of photos popped up on Facebook and Twitter of people visiting with the big mare. And we're not just talking the celebrities propped in there for a photo op. No, people like you and me were able to wander on the backside to get a glimpse, a picture and maybe share a treat with the great mare.
The result? Well, obviously, a fan favorite, but also a development in the media of a horse's personality. Now, anyone who has spent 5 minutes around horses knows that every horse has a personality; the quirks, attitudes, moods and habits that individualize a horse from the herd. We have heard about a few of these attributes in the past in pre-Derby writeups, or in overdramatized NBC and ESPN features during racing broadcasts, but for the first time in a long time, people knew WHO this mare was and embraced it.
Now, we are seeing this continue with expected 2 year old champion Uncle Mo. He has a Twitter account, a Facebook account, and a feisty sense of humor....or so it seems. Sure, it may seem gimmicky, and it is, but something big is happening as well. Fans, press and handicappers suddenly have ownership in this colt as his daily activities, candid snapshots and future plans are shared with them personally.
So what does this do for the sport? At first glance, I found myself thinking "Cute, but it doesn't really have a value". And then I thought a bit more. Blake Shelton, previously an under the radar country singer, busted out in a big way this year. I used to hate him. Then, I started following him on Twitter. And he revealed his personality, his quirks, habits, moods and preferences. I started to find myself wanting to hear his new music. This fall, he won Male Vocalist of the Year. Now, I'm not saying Twitter did that. Of course not. That would be like saying Twitter will win the Eclipse Award for Uncle Mo. But when a star allows themselves to be "exposed" to fans and the such, the industry benefits. Maybe we will see people visiting the track to see Uncle Mo. Maybe we will lose the black eye as the day to day operation is revealed without fear. Maybe, just maybe, some of these people will find out what the rest of us have and be hooked for life. Not bad for a free sign up and a few seconds of work every day on the part of the racehorse's connections.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)